Archive for the 'Internet' Category

Dude, where’s my spam?

Published by Dan on October 19, 2006 in Internet. 4 Comments

Oh, right, in my e-mail inbox.

There’s something about this article that really brings in the spambots.  I mean holy crap, I’m being flooded, and I’m pretty sure that my jerkoff former computer teacher has something to do with it, but I’m not making any formal accusations.  Needless to say, this crap is rediculous.  Every day I’m clearing the comment queue because of yet another retarded spam message telling me I could enlarge my prostate and shrink my ass.  I wonder if they’re telling me my ass will make my penis larger…

But since I’m a nice guy, I’ll post some of these fabulous spam messages right here on the front page, because I’m sure someone put a lot of time and effort to try and make his or her product known on a website that is barely read. 

Except the problem is I can’t, because usually they’re comprised of one or two words. Some of which include:

  • Divorces: apparently every man’s dream.  Except mine. 
  • Suicide: I swear to god I got this a while ago, there’s a suicide pill advertisement floating around the internet.  I’d prescribe this to my ex if I could.
  • Online Casinos, Online Universities, Online Auto Insurance Quotes: Uhh…
  • Life Insurance: Because the next hot dog will likely kill me.
  • Retirement: Now why would you send me one after the other?  That seems counterproductive.
  • Sports Betting: What the hell sports have I ever mentioned?  Just shut up.

This happens over and over on a daily basis.  More spam, more spam, more spam.  And it’s always on that one post!  It’s like there’s a vengeance factor going on here.

Honestly, it wouldn’t surprise me if it was my jerkoff former computer teacher, he seems to find a way to crop up in my life every once and a while, as if I feel bad for systematically ruining his career.  No, not really.  In fact he should probably feel bad for taking advantage of a 14 year old kid who knew more than he did in the field of computers.  The worst part is, I wasn’t even holding any ill-will.  I even tried apologizing to him, but he came back with some snide stalker-like comments on previous posts of mine which make him seem like a balding 50 year old creep. Oh wait…

To Microsoft: Censoring MSN Messenger is fucking stupid.

Published by Dan on July 4, 2006 in Internet. 1 Comment

Wow.

I just tried to send someone a link with the string “download.php” in it. Imagine my surprise when the other party didn’t get the message? Well shit son, it appears that Microsoft went ahead and blocked certain strings of text to prevent “phishing and worms.” As a friend of mine well put it, it’s creepy that there’s certain words that we can’t say for our “protection.”

While from a security standpoint I can certainly understand the necessity to block certain things, but you really can’t prevent user stupidity. If you, the basic idiot consumer, cannot figure out that people you don’t know are sending you URLs with strange filenames, you PROBABLY shouldn’t download it. The security community shouldn’t have to force these things on you because you’re a complete idiot. So I guess in the end I really don’t blame Microsoft for having to take these actions, but I still think it’s fucking stupid.

Don’t agree with me? There’s a comment button here somewhere.

IM worms are funny

Published by Dan on November 1, 2005 in Internet. 1 Comment

Hold on I’m laughing…

Hold on.

Okay I’m done. I was reading through Slashdot today (forgive me, please) and came across this lovely story of a possible automated instant messaging worm attack. Ones that *gasp* don’t require a malacious link to click on.

That last sentence just makes me laugh. In fact, the entire concept of IM worms just makes me laugh. It’s pure genious! Set up a virus that embeds itself into your favorite instant messaging program because you were too retarded to not fully read the link your BEST BUDDY sent you, no matter how many wonderful file extensions are on the end. The bottom line is, these viruses prey on your stupidity. Why bother fighting it? Why not just sit back and let these viruses eliminate morons from instant messaging altogether! They should’ve come up with this years ago when people browsing DALnet constantly spamming whatever channel you were in with the promise of hot cyber sex was considered very annoying.

Pity.

Symantec = A Cry baby sack of shit

Published by Dan on October 8, 2005 in Blood, Sweat and Technology, Internet and Software. 11 Comments

Preface: My friend Steve posted this back in… well, whenever this was posted. It’s actually quite out of date at this point, because Symantec actually did one hell of a job improving their Norton AntiVirus product with the latest 2009 release.I still believe they’re a cry baby sack of shit however. Since you’re here, you may wish to read the rest of the awful site, although most of it is me rambling on about how I hate people. Or Jews. Or blacks.

Okay the last few lines were jokes, don’t get your panties in a twist.

This was recently posted on Slashdot and, I’m sorry, am I the only one noticing how much Symantec has been whining lately? This article in addition to their latest annual Security report does nothing but make me laugh as Symantec is simply furthering, in my belief, that their products just simply suck and I do not see them in the future. Their annual report claims to have found Mozilla’s Firefox browser to be more vulnerable than Microsoft’s Internet Exploder…I mean Explorer web browser. Perhaps these findings are true, I’m in no position to disprove them, but I do find it somewhat interesting to note that as Symantec’s security software, including their popular Norton Anti-Virus, continues to decrease in popularity, the adoption of open source software is increasing, but most notably Firefox. Symantec, although never publicly admitting it, had to have been pissed when they realized that the open source community was coming up with innovative products which were not only appealing due to aesthetics and being offered completely free but most importantly because they have addressed a large number of “issues” which were otherwise dominated by Symantec’s security products with little competition with rivaling software company McAfee. McAfee…thanks for keeping your mouth shut and realizing you suck a long time ago. This is a lesson I think Symantec should learn. Although I’m huge on security, hell it’s one of my major’s in college, does Symantec really live in this fairy tale dream that operating systems, much less the internet is going to be this terrible dilapidated mess forever? C’mon, there’s innovation in technology daily, yes, it might be a very long time before improvement, but face it, at this rate if we don’t address these issues at a higher level than using a memory hogging, ineffective, “middle man” product to protect us, computers will become virtually unbearable in a network environment. So boo-friggin’-hoo Symantec. You know, I’m not the biggest MS fan either by any means, but maybe they’re just finally taking responsibility for the flaws you’ve based nearly your entire product line on. Sorry for your stupidity. Maybe if your product worked as your legacy touts you wouldn’t be sitting in this hot water, but you are. And on somewhat of a tangent, I also find it strangely “timely” for them to claim that Apple’s OS X operating system, a market of users it never had a strong stance with, is particularly flawed and that “Mac users are under a false umbrella” of security. Whatever, yeah, OS X isn’t perfect, neither is XP, or Linux for that matter…what makes Symantec’s opinion on software mean anything when their software can hardly even function, let alone protect.

So in conclusion…fuck Symantec

(*note* I still like Ghost 2003…it’s the ONLY exception)

sup

Published by Dan on October 1, 2005 in Internet. 3 Comments

Hey kids, it’s me Dan. Yeah, that guy who’s owned this website for almost 5 years now. That’s right, me.

I guess I finally did this because I have a few things to say. I have a few observations working in the technology field that some people find interesting anyway, I’m really not sure. What it all boils down to in the end though is, I really don’t care what you find interesting.

I hate regular blogs. I mean, I really hate regular blogs. I’m tired of seeing these LiveJournals and Xangas where people prattle on about their day to day lives as if someone out there on the internet, where I might add there is terabytes upon terabytes of porn, actually gives a shit. And hey, maybe somebody does care about the fact you painted your nails and had rough sex with a few Italian studs. Frankly, those people are stupid.

In fact, it’s not just blogs that I’m tired of. I’m tired of the internet in general. No, I take that back, I’m tired of the way people use the internet. I’m tired of people coming to me with spyware and virus problems because they were too damn stupid to click “no” to the sexy asian woman asking if “you want a good time” which, I might add, the good time that is given certainly isn’t satisfying. The sad reality of the matter is that the internet is more or less an intelligence test. You pass the test if you can last for ANY given amount of time without contracting some rediculous adware or a virus that destroys your Windows directory. The fact is, the internet is not hard to survive. Hell, I’ll even throw in a few tips!

  • Use Firefox – it will stop you from clicking the popup banner ads that ask you if you want to scan for viruses on your computer which really translates to “hey I’m going to install 800 copies of myself and then take a shit on your files”
  • Don’t click banner ads – Seriously. Just stop. Just because it’s flashing doesn’t mean it will make sweet monkey love to you.
  • Stop downloading porn – Go to your local adult store and buy it dammit. Hell, you might even meet another man who you find is your soulmate and take him back to your studio apartment furnished with nothing but piles of old plates and clothes only to scare him off with your disturbing fetish for cheese. Hey man, just saying.
  • Use an antivirus program – Ever heard of AVG Antivirus? It’ll save your life.

There’s probably more tips that I can’t think of, but frankly I think I’m done. But seriously, be smart when you’re using the internet.

And stop making blogs you fucking morons. I don’t care.

edit: Yeah I know this is a blog but since I’m too lazy to write a content management system this will work so shut up ok >:|

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